Kylie's Thoughts

Weekend Mom

2011-01-20T03:47:00.000-08:00

I may not of given birth to them...I may not spend 24 hours a day with them..I may not spend 7 days a week with them...I will never replace there mom but I love them just the same. But with all good comes some bad as well all I wish is that we could all get along and remember it is about the kids..not me not you not dad or stepdad..The kids should be the priority..negativity should be left away from them..Honestly is it necessary to complain to the kids about what there dad or i do with them on the weekends or what we spend on them or buy them or dont buy them..We struggle to make ends meet just as you do, we have bills and other financial obligations like you do, but is it necessary to complain to the kids about this. Please dont send your 5 year old to ask questions about my life..you have my number pick up the phone call me ..ask me..i have nothing to hide.

AHHHHHHHHHHH! I feel better now...life is awesome had a great holiday ..spoiled the kids..spent to much but if we can why not!

This past 6 months has been a roller coaster of life and am enjoying it to the fullest but with all good comes some bad..points up! To all out there married, divorced, step mom, step dad, life partner we all need to keep in mind that children are precious and have enough stress in there little lifes without waving our laundry in front of them, so protect them as much as you can, if you have an issue with some one work it out with them away from there ears believe me they hear everything...dont use them as pawns in your life ..am a firm believer that what goes around will eventually bite you in the ass! Love them unconditionally!

This and that!

2010-09-09T03:19:00.000-07:00

Well am all moved and settled in our new home!

Still some unpacking to do and rearranging but all is good!

The little princess discover SL on my laptop so she thinks it is cool to play dress up on the beach with me! So if I am in world for any length of time i am sure there will be a 5 yr old close by.

Work is work goes by quickly these days but slowing down now that summer has passed us by!

Tried to get the man to come in world but he doesnt get it...would rather cuddle on the couch and watch a movie..even a chick flick he says..

Weekends the kids keep us busy between football andcheerleading and our little excursions to here and there...seems most involve fishing and swings.. enjoying my rl!

well i am off to work then on a mini vacation fo a few days so perhaps a little sl time in the next few days..we will see.

This and That

2010-07-22T03:28:00.000-07:00

Sooner or later we all have to make decisions in life..SL and RL..and those decision may to others look easy but in reality we struggle with them before coming upon the right decision for us as a person...

Lately I have had to do that in my RL and my SL..SL has become just that to me wander in and out of world when i have the time..gave up my land and my home and volunteering at one of my favorite places in world. The time had come for me to do this, to embark on a new adventure called real life..

Over the years in SL I have learned many lessons and have become a stronger person..dont let anyone kid you that it doesnt effect your RL somewhere along the line it will. I have met great people from all over the world and no matter what that wont change. I have had heartbreak and sorrow thru it all but my *virtual friends* have been there for me thru it all. The ups and downs , they have cried wth me and laughed with me and I am proud to call them friends.

My RL I have found someone to share that with me..he makes me laugh and cry.. he treats me better then i have ever been treated and he has brought the happiness back into my life that had been missing for so long! He has 2 wonderful kids that I am getting to know so most of my off time from work is spent with the 3 of them hanging out, and doing diffrent things.

To all who are still in world and those who have wandered away from SL thank you for the laughs and tears!! To my BFF i still miss you and always will!!

HUGS!! for now!

WOW!

2010-07-14T03:32:00.000-07:00

Has been a longtime..much has happened but wont bore you with all the details..I have wander away from SL a bit..Trace and I are no longer together but remain good friends..An era came to an end Big Sur has been closed so have moved on to a new home...

My RL is taking precedent over SL these days met a great guy who treats me like a princess.

I am off to the lovely world of work now but promise will write more soon..I actually remembered my password!

This and That!

2009-12-11T17:01:00.000-08:00

WOW!! been along time since I blogged!

What have I been up to..hmmm..moved from Tora 5...unfortunately Muds is getting rid of the sim..so down graded to a little 4096 for me and Trace made ourselves a cozy little beach home on Big Sur where I started out years ago... Building again something I have always enjoyed..Trace has been working on skins and Blacklace is fine tuning her designing skills..Reconnecting with some old friends and letting in some new ones. Rebuilding my photo studio..Trace is working on animations and posses for it..what a creative man he is.
Unfortunately for the time being with Tora5 going away Tiki Tora is closed for now,,hopefully someday we will reopen it.

Missing some that have left SL and unfortunately over the months have seemed to drifted apart emails are few and far in between or none at all.

Real life seems to be cutting more into SL these days..working to much..learning new things and spending some time with family and friends. Went home for Thanksgiving and spent some time with family and friends and ate to much pie!!

Life

2009-08-13T13:51:00.000-07:00

Life..lately my life has taken an unexpected turn for the good or bad havent really decided yet...

has caused me to spend alot of time thinking and asking questions of myself...

The shape the economy is in these days makes one sit back and wonder.. I work for a strong company showing profits still thru the turmoil of the economy many say i have a recession proof job.. Perhaps I do so why am i thinking of walking away from a good job..a good company..this isnt a fly by night thought have done the math thought about and still not sure about it. Some of my friends tell me to suck it up and keep working ...others tell me to give it up and do what i want for a few years...One thought in the back of my head is how long can my company remain strong and it has changed so much over the years I have been with them..In the recents months i have seen upper level management leave , these are people I have known since i was a teen. I have talked with one or two of them but they cannot really discuss why they left and went with a competitor but have indirectly advised me the time may be right to move on. Sure they could be saying this so i will go work for them so there opinion is very low on my list.

After 25 years I can walk away with a nice sum or do i hold out for a few more years and take a chance. All my life I have done what is expected of me ..so this isnt an easy decision. I have seen many of my friends laid off after years with a company so i do look at that as well. My company has never *laidoff* but unfortunately i have seen many good people pushed out for various reasons.

Perhaps I will hold off and take some vacation and travel a bit then make a decision . It is not something I will do tommorrow but i see a diffrent life in 2010..wether I stay or leave I will be taking care of me!

5 years

2009-08-06T13:16:00.000-07:00

5 years ago today i lost my hero my best friend...my dad..miss him alot these days!

I bought a toaster!

2009-07-23T17:39:00.000-07:00

ok admit it your all going so what?

I went from my parents house to my husbands house.
I never lived on my own so everything I always bought was for our home or my parents home. This is the first thing I have bought for my home. No input from anyone no asking if it was OK to buy it. Just a simple boring toaster..OK it can cook bagels ,,but my point is it is mine all mine :)

For me it was a big step in the realization I like having my own place my own things. An old friend called me the other day to ask how I was doing i said good he said your lieing. He was right realization hit me a few weeks ago that my marriage was over and there was no turning back. I am hurting and probably will for awhile . I know down the road I will be OK. He made me realize this am i concerned about my soon to be ex ..yes i am..but i cannot dwell on it anymore it was his choice as my friend pointed out.

I have to admit I am scared and confused about alot of things but with the help of my family and friends *sl and rl* i know I will be ok and everything will work out and i have a new toaster :P

No More

2009-06-26T17:34:00.000-07:00

about a week ago , i wrote a blog that offended someone and i deleted it at there request..but have decided that what i write here is me expressing myself and if you dont like it dont read it...simple as that......

I was also going to delete this blog and start another one so they didnt have the link..but i have decided screw it..if i am that interesting and you must read me go ahead but dont ask me to change something.

I just love double standards...and people who cannot be honest and up front..some may not see it as deceptions but i do..a deception doesnt have to be an out right lie..but hey life goes on and so will I.

Kittie

2009-06-23T04:49:00.000-07:00

My RL birthday was a few weeks ago and a friend gave me Kittie..OK i did kill him in the first 10 minutes and had to get a replacement..*note* read the notecards..never detatch always drop. Lesson learned...

This kittie is a trip..it snores loudley..had to turn down the sounds. it plays and eats..has a bath attachment but havent gone there yet.

Kittie runs around and climbs in my plants..just like RL..I have no curtains so not sure if it will climb those. Made him his own bed cuz he seemed to like jumping on me during cuddle time.

Tiki Tora Beach Club

2009-05-20T02:38:00.001-07:00

TIKI TORA BEACH CLUB
A joint endeavor from 4 sl friends..kylie...trace..chatbrat..and wacoede..has official opened..come down and party with us ..DJ Wacoede loves to spin the tunes..

Tiki Tora Beach Club

2009-05-06T03:46:00.000-07:00

Hey all..watch for the opening soon of Tiki Tora Beach Club..a joint endeavor of a group of SL friends..will post more soon...

Tears of sadness

2009-05-05T10:56:00.000-07:00

feel the water run down my cheek
tears of sadness no longer hurt
conversations become fewer
contact becomes less and less
tears of sadness no longer hurt

Lips turn to a smile remembering the laughs
laughs to myself thinking of you
tears of sadness no longer hurt
as i sit back and watch our friendship fade
tears of sadness no longer hurt

Someday soon I am sure we will reconnect
Life is busy I understand
Tears of sadness no longer hurt
Will be waiting for that day to come
tears of sadness no longer hurt

Cherished the memories
Noone can take that away
tears of sadness no longer hurt

Reflections

2009-05-04T22:48:00.000-07:00

Two years ago give or take a few weeks..i wandered into this world not knowing what to expect..In my first few days I had met Jeanine and Mana we fast became friends...

Our SL experiences were vast and well at times diffrent ..but isnt that what SL is all about experiening things we know we would never do in RL. It is a friendship that has stood strong thru ups and downs but has always remained there thru it all.

We have a bond many wont understand!

We reconnected tonight and shared experiences and chatted about our first few weeks in SL..even thou our SL is in diffrent places right now we have all come to realize our friendship remains strong and in tact and am proud to call them my *sisters*.

I have come to realize friends come and go in SL and RL ..have said this before but they come in your life for some reason..so cherish the moments that they are there and remember noone can take the memories away.

Friendships come in all types and forms..someone you meet today maybe your best friend tommorrow!

some you share all with..laugh and cry and hold hands when all looks lost..some wander away for reasons that only you know..some come back and some may never but you always know no matter what if you reach out they will be there for you..

Rambling

2009-04-30T04:13:00.000-07:00

I am just so amused at how people can find my life so interesting. I do what I do because I find it interesting or adventerous isnt that what SL is all about...I am me nothing more nothing less...

Best friends

2009-04-28T12:14:00.000-07:00

unfortunatly there comes a time when friendships

drift apart and there is nothing one can do about it.

This sums up alot of friendships

2009-04-15T03:28:00.000-07:00

Friendships come and go we all know that but i came across this poem and it reminded me of alot of them 2 imparticular and if they still check my blog time to time this is for them...moving on but not forgotten..

I know that I can't help as much as I want to.
But I'll always be here to make you smile.
You were always there to make me laugh.
Just remember I'll be here to talk for a long while.

We all know I'm a computer addict.
I always laugh when I talk to you.
No matter if I cried five minutes before.
I know I can talk to you about most of the things I do.

I swear if I ever met you, I'd scream.
Your like my best friend.
I wish you were here.
I want you with me til the end.

Thanks for talking to me.
And thanks for laughing with me.
Remember to always talk.
I love talking to you!

New chapter begins

2009-04-15T02:23:00.000-07:00

New chapter in my sl has begun..he asked I said yes..somethings are still hard but he understands...have yet to go to a sunday formal perhaps this week or perhaps not..Sometimes he is Trace..Sometimes he is Blacklace no matter who he is still him..

RANDOM

2009-04-03T03:18:00.000-07:00

Well my second rezday has come and gone...thanks Trace:)..kevin and Gabs for putting up with me for the day...

I was recently speaking to a good friend and realized how much I have learned about myself thru the past 2 years...circumstances happen for a reason..good or bad..but one does realize that what choices we make deep down there is a reason for them all..The choices we make on SL can and do effect your RL as well..those that say SL doesnt cross into RL is lieing..emotions are real..decisions are real..some are personel choices that yeah can be avoided but for how long till the decision has to made...to go or to stay..to cross into RL for good...

My RL has never been easy ..but it has been all about choices for me..I choose to stay there..I have had friends who have choosen to alter there RL with SL and some are happy ..some regret it but it all boils down to choice and well if you dont try how would one ever know..

My RL is more hectic that it has been..the hubby is going in for more testing..new doctors..new test..medication adjustments..My career is moving forward more responsibilities..which means more hours which means less SL time...And honestly something I need right now for me distractions..SL is my escape from reality but like a good friend told me recently time to take back RL ..*miss you terribly *...but totally see where you are comeing from.

Now back to SL ....people come and go for various reasons...just because one has left doesnt mean that my SL has stopped...We stay in touch thru other means and at this time that is what he needs..doesnt mean I care any less about him ..he will always be my best friend..my confidant..my shoulder..I miss him and always will but will always be there for him and he for me and if someday he decides to reappear in world will still be there..Love you my friend..

OK off to rl I go...HUGS!! KISSES!!! and PICKELS !!!!

Just me!

2009-02-19T09:17:00.000-08:00

RL is catching up to me...so been spending less time in world...but making every minute I do get with Alan worth it..

I am pushing my second year in SL..2 years ago I would of never thought I would still be here but here I am...I came in world to hang out with a long lost friend who has since left SL...but I have days that I wish I followed him when he left and then other days I am glad I stayed...I know that makes no sense to some but there days I feel lost in this world...How can one feel lost with so much to do you might ask...I have days I log in and look at my friends list and shrug! the important ones arent here.. I wander to the Shelter to hang out and meet and help New Residents..that makes me happy...About 2 days ago someone I had helped im'd from out of the blue and thanked me for helping her..that made me smile..I guess I stick around to help..to make someones experience a good one...

I have tried only coming in world when Alan is here...my best friend..my partner..my SL soulmate but that never works..somedays yes other days not as well..So i guess what I am trying to say is if your feeling lost or confused in this world find a New Resident ..pay back what was given to you so freely when you made it in world ...

HUGS TO ALL!!

Am missing my 2 BFF and a great girlfriend who seems to have faltered away from SL for a bit!

But like i try to remember they came into my life for a reason and there memories will last a lifetime

goodbye

2009-02-10T14:54:00.000-08:00

Once again a dear friend has decided to leave SL..for RL..It was coming less and less SL..I wish you well my friend...I can still reach you..you can still reach me which is all that matters..You dont believe it but you will be missed by many..The coffeetable just wont be the same with you not there..CYAH MY BFF!!

25 random things about me

2009-01-29T06:07:00.000-08:00

25 Random Things About Me

1. i love the color pink
2 i spend to much time in second life
3. i suffer from RSD
4. i love coffee
5. I have no kids..but love my neices and nephews to pieces
6. i have 6 brothers and 2 sisters
7. my favorite animal are pigs..no clue why
8. shhhh i actually like my job
9. I am to emotional at times
10. My favorite drink is grey goose and lemonade
11. I miss my dad
12. i color my hair..omg i do
13. i have friends all over the world
14 some of my greatest friends are people i have never met
15 i do really cook..but dont tell anyone
16 i dont drive..never have
17 i am more comfortable is lounging pants then all dressed up..so not a girly girl
18 i have way to much vacation time
19 i hate winters..esp the ice and cold..the snow is pretty thou
20 i am a worrier..want my friends and family to be happy all the time
21 I love country music
22 am running out of things to say..cuz i am a quiet person
23 i have never had fake nails
24 am addicted to flickr..second life pics..hate getting my pic taken
25 OH AND DID I MENTION I AM A COFFEE ADDICT

could tag you all but lol just did that on facebook!! Just a few random things one may not know about me

Reflections

2009-01-02T03:55:00.000-08:00

Well another New Year begins..what will it bring..happiness or perhaps sadness..love perhaps or heart break..wealth or perhaps poverty...

My SL this past year has been full of both..many friends have come and gone..Miss some more then other's...some are drifting away the signs are there they will be gone soon...A few come and go due to RL issues...Get Well LAIL..love you miss you..

Alan what can I say..you are my SL..my strentgh..my weakness,,my soul and my heart..I love you and cannot wait to see what this year brings ..hugs and kisses..love you..

My friends *so not listing them all* they know who they are have been there for me and always will be..

My SL sisters..even thou we rarely spend time together,,I know your only a IM away as I am to you..hugs kisses and tons of love..

My BFF wish you all the best in 2009 and hope you get what you want..your happpiness is important to me..

Kevin..what can I say we have drifted..but I know you are happy and so much in love with Gabs..wish you the best in the upcoming year,,Gabs love you!!

To those who have left ... we all come here for some reason ... hope all is well and your New Year is bright...

Vel and Chat..you guys are the best partners one can ask for..hugs and love for the new year..

so to all... HAPPY NEW YEAR.... and no matter what happens my word of advice to all..do what feels right for you..not what is expected from others..

on that note..HUGS to ALL...

Happy Holidays

2008-12-25T09:19:00.000-08:00

Happy holidays to all..no matter how you celebrate enjoy.

2008-11-26T08:25:00.000-08:00

To follow up..there is one guy who makes my SL worth staying..thank you for always being there for me ..you are my best friend ..my greatest condident..You know me better then I know myself sometimes..safe and secure in your arms..Love you always!!

2008-11-26T06:31:00.000-08:00

confusion..hurt..no clue why
you know i started this blog way back when to express myself and my experiences in SL
but lately seem to be avoiding it for some reason..not sure why..afraid what i say will be taken wrong or out of content..oh that has all ready happened more then once. Maybe i have nothing to say..well that isn't true,,could say a lot but again know it will be taken the wrong way.

I guess coming into this world 18 months ago I never realized how emotionally attached you can become to people and when all of a suddenly they just disappear from your im window it hurts,,esp when you have no reason why..poof one day they are there and the next gone.. Guess that happens in RL as well but for some reason it hurts here more.

go ahead if you must

2008-11-05T03:13:00.000-08:00

So you have decided to *roast* people on your blog and eventually you will get to me I am sure..I could beat you to the punch and *roast* you..but I wont.. Go ahead let the the blogging world know all about me..tell them i had an alt..those close to me know all about it and why..go ahead and tell them I dabbled in the Master/slave world..again those close to me know all about it..Go ahead and tell them all I am not so innocent and sweet ..they all know that I can be a bitch and have done alot of the darker things on SL. Those that I care about accept me for who I am. I am not perfect never meant to be..I am me this is who I am.. So go ahead say what you like about me..I am not leaving or running from it.

Tough decisions

2008-11-01T22:38:00.000-07:00

Looking at my friend's list ..wondering if some will ever return..watching as others come on less and less..watching others fade away..

The decision to walk away from SL is a personal one and I have come to realize that how much you want them to stay ultimately it is there decision. Myself I seem to be spending less time here mostly on when Alan is in world.

Had a conversation with a good friend the other I see them slipping away..less and less time in world..It upsets me but not much I can do...There reply basically was you know how to reach me if you need to and vice versa..

Many factors play into why we are here..for me it is an escape..another friend possed the question what would you be doing if you weren't here..for me coming from a small town in the middle of nowhere..would probably be watching TV or chatting on MSN..I am not one to go out every night I have am always will be a home body.

So ultimately it comes down to a personal choice to stay or go.

Saying goodbye

2008-10-13T14:40:00.000-07:00

Best Friends Forever
Author Unknown

I sit alone thinking of you
and all the things we've both been through
You are my very best friend
and I know you'll be there until the end
Your shoulder to cry on will soon be gone
who will be there when something is wrong
When times are tough you're always there
It shows me just how much you care
Although were going separate ways
you're in my heart till my final days
Nothing can make a person see
how special a friend you are to me
I dreamed of a friend just like you
and finally my dream came true
Nothing else could ever fulfill
everything you're friendship will
You understand a side of me that no one else could ever see
You know whats wrong before i cry
but if I do, you will always know why
A friend like you is hard to find
you put my problems all behind
You were there when no one cared the best times were the ones we shared
We've been together through good and bad
you made me laugh when i was sad
And no one else could ever be
as good of a friend you are to me
Our time together is wilting away
more and more everyday

Sometimes in this virtual world we have a chance to meet extraordinary people who for a short time touch us right in the heart..The kind of person you new from the first hi was always going to be there for you but like that other world we cal Real Life..circumstances change and drifting apart is unavaoidable. Just remember I will still be here. Your life is your priority now enjoy >:)
But now until the very end
you'll always be my special friend.

It Has Been Awhile

2008-10-01T03:42:00.000-07:00

Guess i could make up some excuse to why I havent blogged lately..but I have no excuse..been reading others blogs..one says they dont understand why people start blogs and never write in them. Well..my time seems to be limited lately with RL and SL ..and honestly havent felt much like it ...My SL is good and my RL well those close to me know how that has been going..and I want to thank them for always being there for me no matter what time of day or night..they have been there..they no who they are..THankS!!!!!

Been learning to design clothes these past few weeks cuz VEL drug me to a skirt making class..I have made a few formals and working in gimp!! still confused by it but sure it will get easier or atleast hoping it does..

Alan is great just celebrated our 5 month anniverrsary.. Love you hun!!

Seen many friends just drop off the grid lately..sure they have there reasons and hope one day they will find there way back..But it is and will always be a decision only they can make..I hope they return but I also respect there decision and reasonings.

Well go to run off top build maybe or just hangout not sure which!

HUGGSS!!

Dad

2008-08-07T03:30:00.000-07:00

4 years ago I lost my hero ..my best friend..I was his little girl..He is in a better place..Miss you dad..love you..

Kassi

2008-08-06T06:02:00.000-07:00

Ok so whose idea was it to give 7 year old a cell phone for there birthday..Kassi calls me hi Aunt Luci..and we are talking telling me about her summer and her older brothers new girlfriend and how if they are in his room Mom makes him keep the door open..lol..getting the family gossip from a 7 year old..so everything has a giggle and a i dont get it lol...So i say ok Kass you better go so you dont run up the phone bill she yells NOOOOO!!! I am on my own cell..i was like what yeah Mom gave it to me for my birthday..so we are talking and I had to ask her how many minutes you hvae left thinking it was a pay as you go phone..she says as many as I want Mom is paying the bill..HMMMM thinking a 7 yr old on a reg cell phone...waiting for my sister to call now and yell at me for talking to her for 180 minutes..am sure she used the whole family's minutes.

my responce will be DONT GIVE A 7 YEAR OLD THERE OWN CELL PHONE!!! Parents these days

DEAR SL EX's

2008-07-19T17:54:00.000-07:00

Hi I am the new love of your ex partner..wife..husband..how ever you want to refer to it as. I dont care that he said or she said you will allways be there wife or partner no matter what..obvjously you arent I am now..I dont care that he or she bought you everything you wanted..I have my own Lindens..presents are nice but i like to pay my own way..I dont care that you have his or her cell phone number..I know how to reach my partner if i need him or her.I am happy you still consider him or her your friend but get over it they are not returning they have moved on perhaps it is time you do also.

AHHH feel better now!!!

LOVE YOU ALAN NOW AND FOREVER :):)::)

Friendship

2008-07-10T17:15:00.000-07:00

Friendship comes in many forms in SL. The people you see everyday and say hi to everyday , you may never actually have an im with them and they may never make it to your friends list but in open chat you learn alot about them from seeing them day after they. You can feel there sorrow and you can sense there happiness.
Then there are the friends on your friends list. But how many of them do you talk to on a regular basis. YOu go thru your friends list and think who is this person so you send them a quick im to remind you who they are and you realize they dont belong on your list. So you cut them of do you tell them or just cut them. I am a cutter go thru mine so often. Then there are the ones you talk to on a regular basis and share more with then others.
Then there are those that you may never talk to but you know that they will be there for you no matter. I have a friend on my list that has been there since day 1 can always count on him to listen to my moaning and groaning and give me unsolicitated advice.
Then there is thou core 4 or 5 that are always there and you are always in im with. I am blessed with a few friends like that.We may never hang out regularlly but are in im ALOT.
Then there are those few who make it to your profile..revamping mine so no complaining if your not there. They are the ones who at one time or another where there for you to cry to to whine with to laugh with and the ones you annoy the HELL out of.
Why the friendship blog you might ask..
Well i recently had a great friend one of those core friends who decided to leave SL but we have remained in contact. I will miss RAY with all my heart but want to thank him for letting me in his life and always sharing with me he is a TRUE friend.. I miss you !!

OOPS BEEN BAD

2008-07-04T17:00:00.000-07:00

I admit I have been bad..no BLOG for a month..lost my password *misty syndrome* but it is found WOOHOO..

During this time a GREAT FRIEND has opted to leave SL. He left no explanation..nothing..not answering emails or off lines..I may not agree with the way he has left but respect his decision and will not push for a explanation. Just want to let him know I am here for him when he is ready to talk or chat..You know how to get ahold of me..I miss you..hugs hun!!

Also had my 2nd month anniversary with my ALAN..he was on a RL vacation during this time while i was stuck working. I am back to work full time plus..so less SL time and more RL time..

Me and Alan moved to a open space sim and are working on it ..nothing special just our home and a place for our friends to hangout and yes he has a MAN's DEN..thanks Vel and Shadow for giving him this idea.. Speaking of Vel she also had her first REZ DAY and of course it involved dance poles and men in THONGS..check out my flickr for some pics.

Still working at Casablanca a beautiful romantic club on Monday Wednesday and Friday come check it out.

Ok got to run HUGGGGSSSS to all

Hello

2008-06-04T12:20:00.000-07:00

Well it has been awhile since I blogged.
Nothing really going on. Me and Alan celebrated our 1 month anniversary on the 28th it was nice went and danced at the Crystal Ballroom a very nice place for romantic couple.
I redid my beach got a few new trees and redid my *dance* area, stop by and take a look.
I am working on a sky garden and working on the exterior of Alan's place also.
My RL well I am back to work fulltime now so SL is less time in world.

Reading thru others blogs and realized wow I use to read all the time and havent opened a book in long time think I need to sit on my deck or under my apple tree and read some more.

My nieces birthday is coming up ,Kasi, she called me to remind me and invite me to her skating party lmao..ice skating dont think so..will go but no ice skates. And to also tell me that she is going to have a little sister or brother at Christmas ..yeah another niece or nephew. that makes..way to many..my oldest Nephew graduated from highschool this past weekend and the youngest starts prek in the fall..now I am just rambling so till next time.

HUGS

WTF

2008-05-17T11:29:00.000-07:00

I have pretty much had a week from hell.
I dont get SL sometimes. People hold on to old like it was yesterday. MOVE ON..folks..LEAVE IT GO..I just dont get it..LMAO..maybe just me give someone a chance to explain..but NO to many people believe what others say and dont seek the truth..Well you know what SCREW them you dont have the BALLS to ask me or tell me what I did wrong,,NOT my issue..YOURS.
To a certain someone out there GET OVER IT and MOVE ON..We have and I am not going anywhere.

AHHHHHHH LMAO dont feel better..my strentgh will be back soon so ALL will be well gain..just a few more days

frustration

2008-05-05T03:36:00.000-07:00

So I am a little frustrated..why can't people just say what they mean..instead they act all superficial and beat around the bush about things..What brings this around...someone who I have known a very long time in world and out of world all of a sudden stops returning emails and when I finally catch them on MSN or Yahoo they are very short and curt with me..I know they read this so if there is an issue no matter what please explain..it is so frustration I sit here racking my brain trying to figure out if it was something I said or did.
I have been hurt and decieved enough in this world that I dont really need more of it. I am happy for once everything is going great and perhaps that is it when I first came here I depended on this person for alot and now I barely notice if they are online or in world but checked hasnt been in world in over 2 months. Maybe that is it there RL is very busy at the moment I do know this..but hey drop me a line and tell me this..I do miss our friendship..but we have been here before drifted apart only to reconnect years later..Ok I feel better now..Just remember my friend I am here no matter what.

Kasi's Aunt

2008-05-03T22:23:00.000-07:00

My little brother got married yesterday so I went home for a couple days. Got to hang out with my sister and her 2 kids. Well 6 year olds are all about Barbie. So I played Barbie dolls all weekend but didnt play right. Never realized there was Barbie rules. But now i do LOL. Did you know that you cannot have a barbie tea party till you name all 20 Barbies and give them ages and oh NO boy"s are allowed at a tea party. So No KEN. So my past 2 days have been about Barbie. Barbie.com actually was pretty cool kids site..you can make clothes and shop.Pick up a few pointers from the 6 year old in paint. That kid new what every button did.
We did crafts to make her mom a Mother's day gift..glitter..glue..paint..everywhere..Sorry Sis about the floor but they did say they were water paints..SHRUGS..what do I know. Took Kasi shopping ..giggles she really needed those shoes..think she inherited my shoe fetish..Let her pick out my outfit for the wedding lol..that kid has taste.
Saturday it got to be about lunch time and she wanted a hot dog so looking thru my sister's fridge couldn't find at her..said to her no hot dog's kasi let's call your mom and find out where she hides them she says no Aunt Luci let's go out for them well I don't know my Sister's area well and didnt recall any restaurants close by. She says come on hurry up before they are all gone and I am buying. Thinking how cute she is buying lunch ..she looks up at me and says can I borrow 5.oo dollars please. I am laughing so hard inside give her the five and she takes me to the local convenient store ROFL!! but all proud she pays for those 2 hot dogs with a smile on her face.
Kasi I love you baby you are the best!!!

The other side of the tracks

2008-05-01T03:09:00.000-07:00

The past few days my SL has been very busy and I have met some fun and some very interesting people. I have met VP's of major corporations, I have met lawyers and I have met average people like myself. I have come to the realization that there is more too SL then my little world. Just like RL I need to get out more.
But like real life sometimes we get to busy and realize dam I miss my friends. I am going to my hometown to my little brothers wedding and I am going to have some fun see those friends I havent seen in close to a year. I live less then an hour away but never seem to find the time to go HOME. My RL has been consuming me and I have drifted from many close friends and many can say you are SL all the time..but most of the time I am not here..I am in another program for work or emailing or yahooing to friends or just have the music on listening as I go about my RL.
I have also realized that my friends here are an important part of my RL as well as my SL. A few are her for me no matter what no my RL as well as I do and a few I amstill growing closer to everyday and need to spend more time with them in world then I do..But just like RL sometimes SL is just as hard,,diffrent directions..partners.dates.spouses get in the way of this as well but will work harder on this getting out more ..more exploring and more meeting of people.

Rants

2008-04-27T16:54:00.000-07:00

Ok so my blog well could do the eight things you may not know about me but then the mystery is gone of who I really am..So maybe another time..Could do the group thing but I hide a few of my groups for a reason so wont work either..Could go on about friendships slipping away but what we do here is our decisions and if we feel left behind at times or dont agree with some elses choices just remember to be there for them when they do come back..A true friend always comes back..Could talk about mixing SL with RL but once again that is a personal choice have seen both sides of it..Do I have some mixed well friendships that at times are outside the realm of my computer screen .yeah a few..Have i ever met anyone no..will I well perhaps someday in the future,One never knows now do they. Could go on about the partnering thing and SL marriages but once again a personal choice..Could go on about Role Play but once again a personal thing..Anyone getting my point yet,,

SL is all about personal choices..the decisions you make is the way we want to play..they may not be of the norm , they may not be right in others eyes but isnt this game about haveing fun and my version of fun maynot be the same as the next persons. I dont judge others choices..I may not always agree what my friends are doing and OH I AM sure there is a few of my close friends here who havent agreed with my past choices and perhaps my future choices either,,but I know when it comes right down to it my friends will be there to laugh with me on how stupid that choice was when it is over or to praise me when they see I am enjoying what I am doing.

So that is my rant..personal choice is what SL is all about dont judge and remember a true friend will come back eventually.

LAIL IS BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HUGS!!!!!!

Moving On

2008-04-21T03:14:00.000-07:00

Well Last night I attended the Sunday Formal at the Shelter with Alan Hearn..he has been a rock and a strong shoulder to cry on since my break up from Kyler an I guess I have been his shoulder since the departure of his partner.
I have known Alan for a long time and have always felt a connection with him from a night long ago when he was there and said goodnight to me and 7 hours later said good morning to me one of those time when I was up all night on SL. So last night we decided to see if anywhere this connection will go that I have a felt and smiles he admitted he has felt..Maybe it will be a strong friendship or perhaps it will lead to something more we will see.
Sometimes that special someone in SL is someone who has been right in front of you almost your whole time here..we shall see.

Flickr

2008-04-16T21:21:00.000-07:00

OK I am picture addict RL and SL...I have 2 Flickr pages and was just adding to them the past couple of days pictures I had taken...And in my face is pictures of Kyler and first instinct was to delete them all but I didn't..WHY? you might ask..Even thou it ended badly:(..for those that didn't know we are done..He was a part of my SL and I have many fond memories of him and these pictures represent the good times so they will stay to remind me of the good times ..The memories will fade good and bad but sometimes I may just need to reflect back on them ..

Most of my flickr is times I have shared with friends and things i found interesting to take Pics of and my other site is off friends I have gotten to jump in my photo studio for me..If you want to be added to these PICS let me know I love using my photo studio.

So I am hosting at Casablanca 3 nights a week tonight (wed) i was all alone no Kevin for support and everything went pretty good..Thanks to all my friends who keep coming out to support me and dance away with me. One in particular that I know is suffering over his sudden departure of his partner,,I will be there for you if you need a shoulder and thanks for letting me tag along to see Patrick with you I had a great time.

Well got to run

HUGS AND KISSES TO ALL!!!!

Sorry Misty

2008-04-13T19:15:00.000-07:00

Ok Misty I started out strong for the month then had a lapse I confess it has been a week since I blogged..

I had a busy week thou..OMG I got a job Hostessing at Casablanca a awesome club..romantic and very well designed. Shopping ..I think I have visited every store..a beutiful aquarium that you can walk down into that leads to a underwater room..used for weddings..Romantic gardens very pretty and well done with cuddles and kisses..Come check it out see my profile in world for the link..I hostess Monday..Wednesday and Friday at 6pm SL..HINT!~!~

Thanks to everyone who came and cheered me on my first night it was great having all of my friends around for my debut and thanks Kevin for having the faith in me..I will get all those whatgamacalic thingies down.

Lail still isnt back have been emailing her lately..she sends hugs to all her friends!! I miss you girl!!:( GET BACK HERE!!!!!!!! Luv yah !! Hugs and kisses..

A good friend has left SL permantly I will miss her but she had to do what was best for her!!

Well got to run sleep is calling!!

HUGS AND KISSES AND TONS OF LOVE TO ALL!!!!!!!!!!

Explaination

2008-04-07T20:32:00.000-07:00

My last post after rereading the poem numerous times i will share a little of my RL and what I am going thru..I am not looking for sympathy I have long accepted my condition..I suffer from RSD.A disease that lays dormant and can just appear out of nowhere and as fast as it appears it can also disappear or one can wake up paralyzed..frightening yes and lately the pain has been great and that is why i fear tomorrow.
But the Doctor did start me on new medication and it seems to be working well the swelling and pain is lessening. So I take one day at a time and yes somedays I do fear what tommorrow will bring.

Fear

2008-04-04T16:21:00.000-07:00

I stand here looking around
The room is full

Noone sees the tears
Noone hears the sobs
Noone feels the pain

The tears are real
The sobs are loud
The pain I fear

I hear I am sorry
I hear I feel your pain

Does anyone
Do they really

They mean well
But I am scared
I am confused
I have no idea what tomorrow will bring

I fear tomorrow!

See You Soon

2008-04-02T08:43:00.000-07:00

Dam I miss you allready!!

Friends are hard to come bye..esp ones you know have your back no matter what..I will miss that the most knowing you were always there and never said no when i needed a friend..Good luck and hurry back hun.

And yes one more time we got then to do it WOOHOO shirtless RAY AND CHARLES

MIssing you allready HURRY BACK

HUGS and kisses TONs of love

BE SAFE

Just for you

2008-04-01T20:15:00.000-07:00

Well tonight Kyler surprised me by coming in world..Tuesday not usually one of his nights that he can make it..so we did something beesides Hangout at the SHelter..which we do all the time..we decided to wander around Tora 3 one of the islands near our home also known as Mystical Serenity..

If you haven't been there i strongly recomend it to all..the land is beautiful..such great building and layout..Some fun poseballs and all the slow dances you can think of..Thanks Misty for sharing this island with us all..It was awesome..we will be returning soon ..I am sure we have missed a few things .

Profiles

2008-03-31T20:19:00.000-07:00

Ok I admit I am an avid profile reader..
My profile usually reflects my current mood or makes a staement about me.
My Pics are a combination of favorite places and people..at one time way before Kyler A friend once commented that my pics looked like a little black book..what can i say my best friends here at the time were guys..i dont play well with girls!!

Profiles offer laughs some are funny..some are serious.some are well down right mean..sure there is alot of hidden meaning behind some of them..but hey if they are getting the message across does it really matter how it is done...personally I would prefer the person talk to me and let me know if I did something wrong or not..but that is me!!

So what brings up profiles..well my pic has been and is in quite a few of them..but imagine my surprise when i was doing my weekly friends profile check and WOW my pic was gone no explanation just poof no longer there..I could just IM her to find out why but honestly if the person doesnt want to address the issue ..there loss not mine..

Which brings up pettiness..OMG so much here lately...People seem to dwell on the past or the little issues..that honestly mean absolutely nothing..like OMG she had a party and I wasnt invited well everyone doesnt get invited to everything yeah we may be freinds but sometimes we have no control over situations and well one may get left out but that doesnt mean that you are any less important in my SL life.

Or another pet peeve of mine the he said she said they said...You know what I have learned tell it the way it is..If I am told something and I think it may hurt someone now or in the future you can be DAM sure I am going to tell the person..Why well I think if someone is spreading stories then the person has the right to know to handle them the way they see fit to. Since coming to Sl i have been the onboth ends of rumors some funny as hell and others mean as hell..Those that know me well know to come to me and let me know what is being said.. A few try to protect me which makes me happy i have such great friends here.

So i will close my rambling blog of randomness with this..To my friends my true friends out there thank you for always being there..for never doubting our friendship..for not turning your back on me these are my TRUE friends..And to all the rest..you have an issue or a comment say it to me let me know..
HUGS AND KISSES!!

ps Misty one for the week only two more

Long Weekend

2008-03-30T12:50:00.000-07:00

OMG what a weekend started on Thursday with my REZ DAY party..yep it has been a year..Highliughts of my day included a HUG from my oldest SL friends who seems to be around alot more lately..which is awesome..I am def not complaining there..Spent the day dancing with Trace and Charles and Ray and hanging with Lail..shopping like usual...i am so going to miss you.
Then that evening Kyler..Vel..Chat..and Lail threw me a faboulous party.. It was great..calm for the first hour..from what I hear Vel's rule..*find that hard to believe* then the cages and poles came out thanks to the wonderfully fun MISTY...A fun night of dancing and hanging with all my best SL freinds..thanks guys it was AWESOME!!

Then on FRIDAY was my SL sisters REZ DAY..Mana was here a year also..Met her the first week I was on SL..we became great friends and RL sisters..Her party was great ran into some old friends I hadnt seen in awhile..paths change interest change so I did loose contact with alot of my older friends..bobi..jerzey..and a few others..CONGRATS MANA and thanks for including me in your day.

That brings us to SATURDAY... a Party a SAD party in away one of my best freinds here is leaving SL for awhile..Lail we love you and we will miss you.. I left the poles up and the cages and we danced and hugged and well I am sure some of us cried..she will be missed by many...We ended the evening by all going to THE SHELTER Pool party..something I hadnt done in along time..not normally in world Saturday Nights...family night in RL...Forgot what fun they could be.

Well HUGS AND KISSES TO ALL!!!

Good Bye

2008-03-25T15:11:00.000-07:00

Saying Goodbye

It's really hard to say goodbye
to good friends such as you.
But, since you say you're leaving
there's not much else to do.
Except to pray for God's blessings
as you travel along life's way,
and to wish you good health
and happiness increasing day by day
So, take these blessings with you
and be sure to keep in touch,
take care of yourself - be good to yourself
and remember, you'll be missed so much!

A good friend..probable one of my best SL friends is leaving sooner then she expected..it is best for her and her daughter..she promises to return in a few months and I will be here with open arms waiting on her return.. Lail I will miss you..you always new what to say or be enough of a smart ass to make me laugh when I wanted to cry. Thanks for always being there for me the long nights and shopping sprees at 2 in the morning. Thanks for being my friend partner in crime.. I will miss you..Luv Yah Girl..hugs and best wishes to you and your daughter.

Confusion

2008-03-24T19:16:00.000-07:00

Sadness hidden behind sunshine smiles
Pain covered up with light hearted laughter
No-one knew
No-one understood
But the pain went on and on
Suffering in silence

How many of us does this stand for...How well do we really know each other..Is this roleplay this world we are in ...how easy it is to get swept away in it...The laughter..the tears..the heart break..the rules..the understandings.. is it getting to close or is it still far enough away..How do we know..how do we tell..when is it crossing that line..

Confused
Scared
All alone in this world

My Thought's

2008-03-15T15:39:00.000-07:00

It has been a rough week for alot of us..Misunderstandings..secrets that were never shared..non thinking IM's..just to name a few..realized that once you hit the enter key..your message is gone no taking it back. Unlike real Life you get into an arguement with someone you stop and apologize before it gets out of hand. In IM it isnt as easy..your im's get ignored ..you get removed from friends list and OMG the dreaded mute button and usually you are the lst one to know you have been muted. (Kylie thinks she has been muted)..but hey that is life.

It also had it's ups this week..KYLER was in world more then usual got to hangout and shop and well uhm nevermind..A great friend and i talked and straightened out our issue hmmm perhaps it was one of those misunderstood IM issues I was refering to earlier. And ok I broke down from all the peer pressure and got myself a pair of Chocolate BAX boots..Hello nooone told me I would have to shop some more to get outfits to wear with them. DAM BOOTS!!

Been in world a little more again..cut back on my work schedule a bit..the pain is still there and makes it difficult at times. Well enough for now.

HUGS AND KISSES !!!!

One of my Favorite poems

2008-03-12T18:47:00.000-07:00

Quiet Emotions by Judy Burnette

I always wanted more from you
than you were willing to give;
So now we've gone our separate ways
each with different lives to live.

The bond will always be there
the friendship always intact;
But the time for us has come and gone
and the pages of time, you can't turn back.

I will always be a friend to you
and wonder how you are;
The smiles and laughter I will remember
and our fights have become painless scars.

Sometimes on those busy days
when you've a thousand things to do;
Please let me glide slowly through your mind
and spend some time with you.

In that quiet moment
when you're surprised to find me there;
Just remember even with the distance between us
I am still someone who cares.

How many friendships does this remind you of..looking back there are always a few that will continue to pop into your head..reach out to them clear up that distance if possible. But like I have learned today..hold on to the hope..It can come back ..

Can someone tell me why

2008-03-08T17:35:00.000-08:00

Can someone tell my why we come into this world..why we stay in this world..for the tears and heartbreak..for the laughs and joy..for the friendships we make.

I had a friend tell me recently that this is all make believe the feelings are not real..the issues are not real..the tears are not real..OK i must of missed the MEMO on that one..I sit here with tears in my eyes wondering what..why..who..knowing the answers will never come but that is fine.Well my friend my tears and sorrow are real perhaps some can turn the emtions off and close there hearts but I am not one of those.
I had another friend tell me that it is pretend..people pretend they like you ..pretend they are your friend but will be the first to throw you in if aomething isnt going there way. Well that I can agree with and I always seems to fall for it hook line and sinker..got that MEMO..I always try to be the peace maker and it seems to alienate me from the ones I care about the most.
My reason for this world may be familiar to some..I come here to forget about my suffering, my pain and my reality. I knwo I dont escape from my RL..My RL will always be there and it isnt going anywhere and I have accepted my RL and am moving forward..Perhaps this world isnt for me, yeah I know I have said it before but this past week has been HELL for me more then anyone will ever know. Yeha and everyone sits back and reads this and thinks yeah we know but you dont know..noone knows well one persone does and I want to thank him for being here for me and not judging me ..you know who you are and you are the reason along with a few others that keep me in this world.
So if I am not around as much or yousee me on line but not off my little piece of paradise I am trying to find me my spot in this world..please give me time to be me..dont ask me I dont know and if I did I wont say anyway. Let me be me for awhile.

Friends

2008-03-06T06:45:00.000-08:00

When a friend knows every little thing about you and still loves you for who you are, thats when you know they are a keeper.

Over the past year I have made some great friends in SL..they have proven to me over the past few months that they are keepers..We may not always agree on everything and we have our little spats but when it somes right down to it they have always been there for me as I have been there for them ..To me this shows true friendship..when someone is willingly putting aside someone to come running when you need them it shows how strong that friendship is.

So to all my friends out there you know who you are thanks for the shoulders and the hugs:):)

Rez Approaching

2008-03-02T15:05:00.000-08:00

WOW I have been in world for about a year..Who would of thought..I came here with a friend to see what it was all about..We started out strong jumping right in..OK he did the tutorial thing and I had him TP me out when he was done..Dont suggest that to anyone..guess what it is there for a reason I am still having flying issues. My friend no longer plays on a regular basis pops in and out every 2 months or so I do miss him in world but we have a strong RL connection so that is just as well.

Looking back over the year I have made some mistakes but cannot go back even in SL..Would I do thing diffrently yeah I would..I would of been more me in the beginning..friendlier and not as shy..but RL that is me believe it or not I quiet in RL..I have made some great friends here some I trust more then those in my RL.Can always depend on themto tell me the way it is. I have spent many days holding the hand of a sick friend or a heart broken friend.Have shared in the happiness of others as well. What am i doing for my REZ day not sure as of yet..having a blown out party or perhaps just a quiet get together of all those that mean so much to me, the trusted few that I have let into my SL world and know that under any circumstances they will have my back as I will have theres..

Another Friday

2008-02-15T22:20:00.000-08:00

Well Valentines came and went..love blossoming all over....

Not much going on this week been kinda low key..spending alot of alone time in my tree thinking and working on pictures from a friends wedding. Thinking alot about old friends and empty promises..drifting further and further apart not much i can do I guess but accept the fact that they have moved on and I guess didnt value our friendship as much as I thought. Makes it tough to see them day after day and wonder why you barely get a hello out of them. Perhaps something is going on in there RL or there SL 2 months ago we told each other everything now it is like we are complete strangers but I still try but I guess perhaps the bond wasnt as strong as I thought it was and it has been broken.

My RL after much pleading and begging the doctor let me return to work..well my first day I lasted 6 hours and was at the doctors office the next day..he changed my release to 4 hours a day ..so we will see what happens..Having more testing done next week hopefully the doctor will find a way to atleast lessen the pain.

Speaking of pain let me just say something about the *players* of SL..the guys who are the smooth talkers...say what you want to hear..pull you into there web and then wham walk away or find some excuse not to see you again because they allready got what they wanted...oh yeah and dont forget the same ones who will im you when they are bored or want a little action..or the ones who will twist everything around to make you look like the one who played them..SO *PLAYERS* beware we are on to you..dont knock on my window or my friends window because guess what we talk and we pass on the names of the *players*..Silly boys we are not as stupid as we look..or perhaps we are the ones playing you.:):):)

Missing my Kyler..dont see him as much as I would like but sometimes that is good..spending every moment of SL with your partner is not always the best thing to do..Everyone needs some alone time or friend time. I learned this early on in my SL life..well that is a story for another blog got to run.

HUGS AND KISSES TO ALL :):)

R.I.P. Jenn and Russ

2008-02-12T09:47:00.000-08:00

This week 21 years ago 2 of my best friends were killed in a car accident. Lost that day were 6 others in the same accident.Many lives changed that day and some still are not the same. It was a tragedy that many will never forget. I being one of them. We were young and foolish and thought nothing could hurt us we were indestructable. To this day I have many unanswered questions and so do many others but we will never get those answers. Accidents happen and we can not change that..but we can keep them in our hearts and there families in our prayers. Tomorrow like every Feb 13th I will talk with her mom and remember the good times as well as the heartaches.
Bad roads..bad judgement..drugs and alcohol played a major role in the accident..So not wanting to preach just remember when getting behind that wheel even the best intentions can maynot be the right thing to do. I will remember then always and cry with there families on this day and preach to all do not get behind that wheel and thou you are young and think you are indestructable you are not.. accidents happen and many lives can be effected for ever over one incident.
So please in memory of my friends think twice before getting behind the wheel no matter what your age we are not indestructable

Yes I did it

2008-02-08T16:42:00.000-08:00

OK to all that know me and know me well..my decision to partner was not taken lightly.I swore I would never after seeing so many failed attempts by my friends but yes I did it.. On Tuesday Kyler asked me to be his partner and I excepted and partnered with him..He is a great guy..funny ..honest and HOT....

Congrats to my friend Charles and Heaven who will be doing the SL marriage on Sunday..wish you guys all the luck in the world and just remember no matter what just have FUN!!!!

Well not much more going on so will end short and sweet this week

HUGS AND KISSES TO ALL

Another Week has come and gone

2008-02-03T09:56:00.000-08:00

Well another week has come and gone in Kylie's world.. Heaven and Charles wedding is right around the corner them and Kyler have humored me and let me photograph them as I play with poses and lightening to view the pics you can go to www.flickr.com/photos/kaslpics/ tell me what you think dont be shy about it always looking for ways to improve.

What have I learned this week...well..sometimes friends need space and time alone they will let you know when they want to talk just give them space..You can see them hurting but you know it is pointless to push the subject they will come to you when they are ready to talk or just to hangout again.

Saw what heartbreak can do to others..think they arent effected by the emotions but wham all of a suddenly they realize that the feelings were there all along and it is to late the damage has allready been done. The lash out and do things they normally wouldn't of done just out of heart ache and desperation..but turn around afterwards and wish they hadn't done that or said that..realizing how much more it hurts both them.

Built another house this week pretty good if i do say so myself..finishing up my mountaintop garden..best compliment one could get a good friend ask me if she ever does get married could she married there.

Well i will finish up now..nothing much going on this past week..but well felt the need to blog at least once a week.

The memories i hold on to
The tears have dried
The window will be open

The dreams are new and fresh
The smile and laughs are back
The fun is back

______________________HUGS AND KISSES_____________________________

The

REFLECTIONS

2008-01-23T20:20:00.000-08:00

Well i has been awhile..in my boring SL life..remember how frustrating it was with your first home and land and you kept taking it or textures just didn't seem to be right..I have a friend going thru that..just remember before long you will be a old pro...

Remembering back to those first few days the thrill of learning something new..the friends you made and the friends you lost..The intentions were always good promised each other you would be friends for ever..Now almost a year later you can see that drifting apart and nothing you can do to stop it..You try daily but the conversations get shorter and more abrupt..you use to tell them everything no matter now you hesitate and hold back..telling them just enough to satisfy there questions. You have something you want to say but hesitate..knowing they don't want to hear it so you keep it bottled inside,,you know soon you will explode and probably ruin the friendship for good, but deep down you are hoping they figure it out on there own.

Sitting here reflecting back wondering what happened to that first one you danced with or the first one who took you out of the Shelter..I remember a great guy who i spent hours with wandering the Rose Garden and exploring with..hmmmm wonder what he is up to now. I remember my first heart break like it was yesterday ...smiles it was great while it lasted..and it hurt when it was over. Why all the remembrance you might ask...well ran into a old friend today spent hours chatting on the beach with him..him telling me i was his first SL love and how i broke his heart when I turned him down. Looking back I was blinded by others words about him I let him slip away..he is happily partnered now but needed to see me to close that part of his heart as he put it lock the box away and never open it again..I t was sad but I am glad I got to chat with him again..realized how much i have missed his wisdom and words.

Made me reflect back on my own heartbreak and realize that for every sadness that happens a new door opened..met a lot of great people had a few serious and a few not so serious relationships here but had never found the perfect SL guy..Everyone I compared to the one who hurt me so bad..realizing now that along they way I missed out on some great guys because of the influence he had over me. Noticed I used the word had in that last sentence..I realized today that it was me holding on to something that was obviously over along time ago..we will remain friends I am sure but he will no longer be the person who holds all my secrets anymore I have released myself from him and am moving on. I know he will still be there for me if I need him like he has always been and I will be there for him but he will no longer be the reason for my tears and sadness. ( which he never even new he caused)

I am moving on have found a great SL guy whom I plan on spending the rest of my SL with. You know who you are thanks for putting my heart back together..wiping away my tears..and putting a smile back on my face..I love you and am never letting go.

3:45 A.M.

2008-01-11T00:46:00.000-08:00

A good friend asked me today when do you sleep..I sleep rarely 2 to 3 hours here and there..I have sleep issues allways have.maybe it is the medication..maybe it is the pain..maybe it is a SL addiction LOL!!
The past 2 months have been rough on me..i am unable to work and doesnt look like I will be going back soon..I pester the doctor everyweek when I see him but he just looks at me and shakes his head no.
I have met some great people on SL and strength some friendships and weakened others. I have learned to forgive and forget it isnt worth the drama. I am always willing to give people 3,4 or even 5 chances. Life is shorter then one thinks and one never knows what tommorrow will bring..a simple fall can be an uphill battle..So remember that no fight or arguement is worth holding a grudge forever over..so forgive forget and move on.
A friend will be returning to SL soon and I am hoping he can look past our disagreement before he left to renew our friendship..I have missed him so..but not all are as forgiving as I am so if he does great if cannot well not much I can do about it.
A great big thank you goes to all who have been there for me these past 2 months to name then all would take to much space and if i leave anyone out well we know drama would be involved so just to say you know who you are...thanks to all

UGH note missing Kyler..wish you were here more but the time we spend together more then makes up for it YO BABE!!!

HUGS KISSES AND HAPPINESS TO ALL

To my friends

2008-01-08T20:51:00.000-08:00

If I could catch a rainbow
I would do it just for you
And share with you its beauty
On the days you're feeling blue.
If I could build a mountain
You could call your very own;
place to find serenity, A place to be alone.
If I could take your troubles
I would toss them in the sea,
But all these things I'm finding Are impossible for me.
I cannot build a mountain
or catch a rainbow fair,
But let me be what I know best,
A friend who's always there.

New Beginings

2008-01-06T08:02:00.000-08:00

A few days ago..
I am out shopping for what else boots..(on the quest for the ugliest boots in SL)..I hear a YO BABE..words I hate by the way..I start to type..I turn my camera and here standing in front of me is this WOW guy..in a pink shirt..got to love men in pink..So I return his yo babe to him..he wants help picking out boots..We chat over the boot shopping and find out he is a newbee is search of the right clothes..We spend the evening shopping and poof he is gone..OMG I am thinking did I add him as a friend..checked I did..I *im* a friend ask her if it is possible to be in love after 3 hours she tell's me no it is LUST..I am like ok then I am in lust. She laughs not again Kylie..ok i will admit I have a bad habit of falling for SL men who say the right things and do the right things..but honestly it has been awhile since i let myself fall or even think about it..I have been extremely cautious you would be after being hurt one to many times..anyway I am rambling I do have a point.
The next day I decided I needed a SL make over the works..skin..shape..hair..clothes and attitude. I got all these along with the new attitude..The past is the past the future is my new begining..I decided to let go of my *lugage*(sure there is atleast 1 person happy about this), to move on to bigger and brighter to things to control my future not let it control me. I am in search of the man in the pink shirt(Kyler) and have found him..Yeah it may be to soon to tell and I do have my eye on a few others that I have always had my eye but I think I may have found my SL love..Even though another wise friend told me 2 dates and that wouldnt be wise to partner HMMMM........wondering if 3 id the lucky number...only kidding..Partnering this comeing from someone who said they would never partner OMG what is happening to me..All I do know is I m enjoying my SL once more.
The tears are gone
Replaced by laughter
The sadness is gone
Replaced by joy
The heart was close
Replaced by a little opening
The yesterdays are gone
Replaced by the tommorrows

Hugs Kisses and Love to all:):)

answered questions

2008-01-03T23:13:00.000-08:00

Spoke to the one i miss he will be returning to world soon..I cannot wait have missed him so..Sometimes just the comfort he is in world is all I need..to know if I click that box he will appear. I know we all have one ..one we dont realize how much we will miss until they are gone...one we know we can always count on..one that excepts us for all no matter the path we choose to explore here..Over the past weeks being in world way to much I have met some great people made some new friends..ones who have been here unconditionally..but even thou I love them all they cannot replace him.
Some who read this think they know me well..no who I am talking about but you are wrong..my unconditional friend is returning to me..to him I say..

Life is short takes unexpected turns
Life is worth taking that stand
Life is worth waiting for
Someday my friend we will laugh
Someday my friend we will cry
Someday my friend we will enjoy
The past is behind us
The future is ahead of us
Let us go forward
Let us not go back
Tommorrow is everything
Yesterday is nothing
I will wait for you
I will long for you
I HAVE MISSED YOU SO
Welcome back to my world
Welcome back to our world
hugs kisses and love to you

New Year's Day

2008-01-01T12:08:00.000-08:00

Standing here reflecting back on the year..Lots of laughs and smiles..new friends..old friends reconnecting..joy heartbreak..Some have gone some have come ..I have made alot of close friends..I have missed some..The world taking us in 2 seperate directions..Our paths cross on occasion but not nearly enough..realized that last night when Zaggy came into world and actually spent sometime with him..his baby is 3 months old allready..OMG where did the time go..My New Year's SL Resolution connect with all my friends see if they are are still here and where they are and compare experiences..It is a big world out there...So keep your friends close and make new ones to expand your experience..
HAPPY NEW YEAR

Missing You

2007-12-31T00:25:00.000-08:00

Missing You
I sit here early in the morning
My heart is sad..I am missing something
I am missing you..your laugh..your voice..your smile
I sit and wait to see your name pop up..
I sit and wonder will you have time for me..
I sit and wish you will come back to me..
The World just is not the same without you.
I wander aimlessly waiting for you..
Come back soon my friend..

Christmas Day

2007-12-25T16:27:00.000-08:00

Today I popped in world to see a friend they asked and i came to see them..It was bice to be missed but what wasnt so nice where the immediate im's so I have cleared my list of most only left the few on i know I can count on..So if I cut you I am sorry but sometimes on has to do things for themselfs.

Hope everyone's holiday was good mine defiently got better..thanks:)

Who can you trust

2007-12-23T17:00:00.000-08:00

I said she said we said..what is with all the drama..I am losing a great friend over rumors and inuendos..I am taking a break for awhile..the fun has gone out of it again..I dont even want to log in anymore..so I am not for awhile..HAVE A HAPPY HOLIDAY ....

Life throws you a curve sometimes

2007-12-19T11:43:00.000-08:00

Standing around wondering silently..how many are here for an escape..how many are hear to find that specielone..how many are here because there is nothing else one can do but be here.
Life throws one a curve sometimes...one day health as can be the next a twist or fall and your life goes in a spiral of doctor's visits and testings only to find out your life you once new will never be the same..Your in this world to do what you can not in your own..to dance..a impossibilty now..to shop..even that wipes you out in the Real world..To work..they are telling you you many never go back..
I am not sad..I am overjoyed it isnt life threating..it can go away as quick as it came on..but how many people here are sad..are worried..are nervous not knowing what tommorrow will bring..So smile be happy..meet greet..talk to others..you could be making there day or you could be making a great new friend.

Refections

2007-12-14T11:11:00.000-08:00

I stand on the bar and look out over the crowd wondering...who will be back...who will go...why have I stayed..what is the attraction or addiction..the great friends i have made..the great friends who have left..the heart ache ..the sadness..the good times...the laughs the tears..the emotional rollercoaster they are about to embark on..I offer guidance..sometimes a ear for listening..sometimes a tear for there suffering..all are here for diffrent reasons..all stay for diffrent reasons..some go and some come back..some never comeback..

My First Blog

2007-12-11T08:17:00.000-08:00

Hmmm....
What does one write.......
A day in the life of Kylie ..........
Well today I learned the art of atanding on the bar from Misty.....the views are rather nice...then SL went down for maintence..that sucks..
So know i sit here..bothering friends while they work.makeing a blog..and yahooing with friends..
hmmmm perhaps I will update my myspace site or my facebook site or there is always my SL profile I can update...MY GOD I really need to get back to work......UGH....